Learn to aim!

Seriously, it's not that difficult. I'm a guy, I pee standing up, and I have about a 99.99% success rate of not peeing on the seat. It's really not that hard. Point and shoot. The .o1 percent is there because even the best of us drift off and start thinking of other things, it happens.

But seriously, every time I walk into the bathroom here someone has peed on the seat. I guess that's what you get when you live with 100 soldiers, but still ewwww. Clean up after yourself, am I right?

Why I run

I used to be a runner. I looked forward to my long runs on the weekend, and they could last several hours. I loved it. But the reason that I started was to get away from my roommates. I had a roommate that I absolutely couldn't stand, we were just fundamentally different. So I took up running after we would come back from our daily routine. At first that's all it was, time away from everyone else. When you work and live and spend your entire day with the same people it's nice to have some time to get away. So I ran. And eventually my short runs turned into longer ones, and the short ones got easier.

Then we finished our school and got assigned to different units. I moved in with roommates that I actually liked, and for a short time I stopped running. After a couple of weeks I realized that something was missing, so I started running again. It became a type of meditation for me. Throughout the whole day my mind is constantly running and analyzing things, and running is the 30 minutes to 2 hours a day that I could stop thinking. Or at least think minimally. Breathing? check. Legs moving? check. Heart beating? check. Uh-oh, here comes a hill. Still breathing? check. Legs still moving? check. Heart still beating? check. Repeat until finished.

Then I became known as a runner. It was part of my identity. People would ask me for advice on how to get better or faster and I would help them. It was a part of me. Then along came the hernia, and my hatred of doctors. Combine the two and I kept running through the pain until it got to where I couldn't run anymore. I kept losing fitness until I finally got to the point where I had to go to the doctor, and they recommended surgery. So I got it fixed, but it was another month until I could run again. And about that time I went and spent six weeks or so out in the field doing training for a deployment, and didn't have time to run. My fitness continued to decline. Then came the deployment, and saying that it was a high operational tempo deployment wouldn't do it justice, we barely got time to sleep, let alone spend time running.

Then I got out of the Marine Corps, and I was exhausted. Physically, mentally, the four and a half years really took it's toll on me. And I didn't run for almost a year. Finally a few months ago I started again. It's almost depressing to go from being able to run for hours to only being able to run for a half hour or so.

So now I'm running, again I started to get away from roommates and coworkers, but this time I have a problem. They run with me. It's the first time that I've ever had running partners, and it's weird. They're competitive and loud and it's so much the opposite of the peace and quiet that I'm seeking I don't know how to handle it. So now I'm starting to run farther, or slower, just so I can get time alone. It's still entertaining, but in a different way. I'm expecting them to not stay running with me for too long though. I give it a week or two and they'll stop running with me. If they don't then I don't know what I will do.

Smokers make me giggle

Ok, so maybe that sounds a little gay. Whatever

But they do! My roommate was trying to quit smoking a while back. He told me, "oh it's easy, it's all a mindset thing." With cigarette in hand he said, "I quit a few years ago and it was simple, I didn't have any cravings." Puff, Puff.

Two days later he was smoking again. When I asked him about the mindset thing he said, "yeah, well, uh." And walked away.

What's the magic phrase that every smoker utters, "I'm not addicted, I can quit any time I want."

Well Einstein, that's the whole point of addiction, you don't want to quit. You introduce foreign chemicals into your body that literally change the way your brain works, and it becomes dependant on those chemicals. It makes you think that you want to keep doing it, no matter how destructive it is to your body.

There are smokers who realize it though, and genuinely don't care. I have some respect for them, because they understand they are addicted.

But self denial amuses me, just like, "I'm not fat, I'm big boned..."

The Girl

This story I didn't actually experience firsthand. But it's from a very trusted source. It comes directly from an aid/relief worker. I'm not sure when it occurred, but it really helps give you an idea of the mindset of these guys.

A woman came into the aid clinic for help, she had been very badly beaten by her husband. They brought an interpreter over and started talking to her, apparently he was beating her because she couldn't get pregnant. She wanted the doctors to find out what was wrong with her. Because of course it has to be her fault right? They decided to do a little investigating, and they brought the husband in. They questioned him about it, and he explained that yes, he was beating her because she couldn't get pregnant. That's just par for the course around here. So they dug a little deeper, and found out that basically, he was doing it wrong. You see, the only kind of sex ed this guy had received was from what his father did to him. So he thought that was how you had sex. Which of course explains the lack of pregnancy. They explained to him the proper way to do it, and they all lived happily ever after...right?

The Terp

Well, it's been a while. See the problem is that I get so caught up in the day to day routine out here that I forget to post. oops. All kinds of interesting things happen out here, well, interesting, stupid, scary sometimes. I just forget to write them down. So here's today's story, actually it's not from today, it was a while ago, shhh...


Across the alley from my room is the interpreters room(shortened to terp by the Army, since obviously interpreter is way to long of a word.) We interact occasionally, and since most of them speak a little English they lose a lot of the monkey like qualities that most of the locals possess. Actually typically the terps are more educated and intelligent, and process things a little more quickly then your average Afghan. They actually almost seem human.

At any rate there is this terp, we will call him 'J.' He's been trying to get a visa to go to the US for a while now. We started talking to him about it, and why he wanted to go, what he was going to do, etc. He gave all the typical responses of wanting to see what it was like, and that he enjoyed the culture and everything, but there was one disturbing portion of the conversation:

US: So, are you going to take your wife with you to the States?

J: No

US: Why not?

J: Because American women have a lot of freedom, I don't want my wife to see that. If she see it, she will want the same thing. It's easier to keep her under control this way.

I think the worst part about it was the fact that he delivered it in such a matter-of-fact way. It didn't even phase him that he was purposely controlling another human being. It didn't even phase him. But, then again, it's part of their culture. Disgusted yet? Stay tuned, you will be...

The Obaguration

Obama+inaguration=Obaguration

Why does no one get it?

And why hasn't it caught on?


Well it's over. The Obaguration, that is. President Obama is now officially in office. I watched the event from Khogyani Afghanistan, I'd like to say surrounded by soldiers, but there were surprisingly few present. I was a little disappointed actually. If you love him or hate him, he is their new Commander in Chief, and I know that when I was a Marine, I sure would have wanted to know what his plans were. Of course, I've been mostly disappointed by the US army as a whole, but that's a story for another time...


I'm a little irritated by the people who are already bashing this Obama guy. You haven't even seen him in action yet, how are you bashing him?

Anyone who thinks the President is anything other then a faceman for the government needs to go back and read the Constitution. In reality the bulk of the power is where it should be, in the hands of Congress. The President's job is to rally the people, interface with other Presidents and world leaders, and to be held accountable to the people for the shortcomings or successes of the government as a whole.

It's a thankless job. People kick you when you're down, and try to tear you down when you are up. They look for every little flaw, and poke at it until it either goes away or grows into something bigger. Sure, they get compensated, $400,000. a year. Sounds like a lot of money to the average American, but compared to the salaries that they could be earning at a major corporation, it's nothing.

So why do people run for the presidency? Some like the power, some like the presitge, some actually want to accomplish something for the good of the American people. I think President Obama falls into that category.

He's a great faceman. He's attractive, he's got an attractive wife, two adorable daughters. He's calm, collected, and always well spoken. But he's got that one quality that most other politicians lack. And he's got it in spades. He's got integrity. It just bleeds out of him and everyone around him sees it. They revel in it and are energized by it. It's how he got millions of people who have never shown an interest in politics to go out and vote. It's how he got two million people to leave their nice warm homes to stand out in the freezing cold DC air and watch him get sworn in. It's how he's energized the entire world to believe in him and the change that he represents.

And it's also poised to be his downfall. In his speech, he told us that the next few years will be hard work. Revitalizing this country will take time and effort and sacrifice. And people cheered, but they didn't truly hear him. Because when it comes down to it, we all want the easy fix, and we were hoping he would give it to us. He'll fix it, I'm confident in that, but not at the speed our microwaving, fast food eating selves want it to happen. And I think in a few months, when people start looking around, and nothing has changed, they'll start asking questions. And getting angry. They'll start suffering from a bad case of buyers remorse.

I hope I'm wrong, and I hope to be the voice of reason during this time. We're facing difficult times, and it's going to take time to fix it. All I ask is that we follow the person that we elected to get us out of this mess. Not blindly of course, but don't oppose him because things aren't happening fast enough. Do your part to help this change happen, whatever it may be. Cut your hours so you neighbor doesn't lose his job, nurture your children. Invent some new energy creating device that runs off of hopes and dreams. Do whatever you are capable of. Help this nation become great again. Become the change that President Obama has promised us will come, and watch some truly great things happen.

I'm gonna run, run, run

Today I had what I like to call a breakthrough run. you see it's been more then a year since I've run seriously, and for the year before that I only ran when I had to. Meaning I only ran when the Marine Corps made me. But before that I was a fairly serious runner. I could log 7ish minute miles on a very good day, I'd run up to 50 miles a week. I started getting serious about running a marathon. So I trained, and it got interrupted with a depolyment, then started training again, deployment again. That's when I stopped running seriously.
Anyway, here I am at this small base in Afghanistan, not in good shape at all, haven't run much in forever, and today I decided to run a marathon. Well, I'm not going to run it today, of course but I want to run one. I setting my sights on September.
But this run I went on today, it's a tough run, and the only one out here really. It's a two mile course around the outside of the base. About 2/3 of it is uphill, and 1/3 is downhill. I've ran it a few times before and I've always had to stop running because it's just a tough run. I couldn't handle it. At first it was because I wasn't in good enough shape, then it became a mental issue, I just didn't have the drive to make it up this hill over a mile long.
Ah, but today was different. I started running on the downhill portion, where I always start. It was easy at first, which is typically a bad sign, because that usually means that I will crash in the end. But I kept going. And when it got tough, I kept going. I slowed waaaaaaay down, but I kept going. And I finished. It was only two miles, but it was a tough two miles. And it was a run that I haven't been able to complete before. I'm not too excited, because I may go out there tomorrow and completely fail, but now I know I can do it. And now I know I'm ready to start training.